Tired is the one word I would use to describe myself. It is my usual state of being.
I am a single mum. I work. I work nightshift, at a hospital, and much of my non work time is taken up by a myriad of hospital appointments.
I have two children. My treasure is about to turn eleven. In fact, eleven years ago I was carrying him in my belly (or uterus to be precise), overdue, married, and happily anticipating the arrival of my much wanted first child. Now my treasure is almost my height! I lean up to kiss him on the forehead. He astounds me with his intellect compassion and wit. That is sometimes he astounds me, because most of the time the only thing he has any interest or passion for is game consoles!
My sweetpea has just turned nine. It dawned on me today that she has also turned into a diva. Her life has become the focus of our world as we watch her afflicted by a rare degenerative condition. As she progressively loses the ability to balance and co-ordinate, I see myself juggle. I juggle medical appointments, sometimes three in a day (our record is six in one week). I juggle feelings of guilt that her condition is caused by a genetic defect that her father and I both gave her, although we had never even heard of her condition before her diagnosis, and guilt that her condition demands so much attention to the detriment of her brother. I juggle determination to see her included, normalised and protected and wonder how I can manage to pull all of that off. My wish was that her disability would not mean that she grows undisciplined, however I do see that she is somewhat spoiled.
I have a soapbox. I am opinionated and have a lot of fodder for venting. Thus the initiation of this blog. In coming episodes I imagine that I will be sprouting about topics that include working, parenting, lost dreams, rare conditions, ex-husband, and any other topic that comes to mind at the time. I hope it is entertaining.
:-)
